With all due respect, I can`t do what you want. I can`t copy/improve a concept which was already submitted. That concept belongs to quroin and he`s the only one who can improve it. We have some rules here and one of them clearly says:
"Please do not ask Designers to include elements from the designs of others. This includes unique font treatments, icons, shapes, and in some cases, layout of elements. Requesting similar colors is the only similar element a client may request."
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"Please do not ask Designers to include elements from the designs of others. This includes unique font treatments, icons, shapes, and in some cases, layout of elements. Requesting similar colors is the only similar element a client may request."
https://logotournament.com/help/client/35
Regards.
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Here is another version with foil on the window.
All the best.
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Please let me know if you would like to see any revisions (fonts, colors, layout etc).
Thank you.